Monday, April 6th, 2009

I completed my last round of chemotherapy today. I was expecting two more rounds, but Dr. Chugh said this twelfth round will be it. It is disconcerting and overwhelming to think about getting back to normal life. I ask if I can stop taking my remaining medications, including my antidepressant, but Dr, Chugh warns me that the transition period I am entering is often more difficult than going through treatment.
From now on I will have scans every three months and will only have doctor visits at that time. I will need bone scans once a year. It is alarming to know I will go so long without being monitored. Dr. Chugh informs me that I will need to keep my port in for about two years and Ryan and I will not able to try to have children for the same amount of time.The first two years is the time whenI would be most likely to suffer a relapse. This is crushingly disappointing to me. But Dr. Chugh reminds me how blessed I have been during this long journey. My cancer never metastasized. My tumor responded well to treatment, shrinking significantly. I did not need to have my heart opened during surgery and they were able to get clear margins. The tumor cells were dead when they were tested. She is very happy with my progress, and so am I. There is about a thirty percent chance that my cancer will recur, but Dr. Chugh tells me to live my life like I am one of the seventy percent who never have to worry again. She tells me that she will watch me closely for the rest of my life.
I am expecting that this last round will be easy, since I have come to anticipate how I will react to my treatments